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Bullied

24 May
Joshua Rush as Robbie- The Basement

Actor Joshua Rush

Hello! Welcome to my blog. My name is Vashti Quiroz-Vega, for those of you visiting for the first time. I am a writer of Fantasy, Suspense and Thrillers. I do, however, have a tendency to mix a little Romance, horror or humor (among other genres) into my stories.
I love art, creativity and beauty, and I know these come in many forms. In my quest to build my author platform, I have met and befriended a group of incredibly talented individuals. Writers, poets, artists and even singers who are masterful at what they do. I feel blessed to have found them, and I would be selfish if I kept the beauty, artistry and creativeness of their craft all to myself.
So for the next few weeks I will be featuring their art, writings and music along with my own work on this blog. I guarantee you will enjoy every bit of it.
In today’s post I will feature the poet and writer Adrianna Joleigh. She wrote the poem “Bullied” specifically for my novel The Basement. I am honored and grateful for it.

Bullied

Raped from prosperities
Bleeding tears rain
Hopelessness infuriates
Self-loathing remains

No reason to wake up
No reason to smile
No reason to feel
I am worthwhile.

Surrounded by hate,
And I don’t know why.
Wanting only to be loved.
Vulnerable to their lies.

Why am I not perfect?
Why am I not pretty?
Why am I too fat?
I Wallow in self-pity.

Repeated struggles
to end my misery.
Hating the image I see.
Who here would miss me?
—A. Joleigh

How A Bully Is Made

Bullying is a serious issue that is faced by many people. Bullies have existed since the beginning of time, as have the victims who have suffered from bullying. The age-old question is, What makes a bully act like a bully?

Do bullies really enjoy making another person miserable or causing them pain? What do they get out of striking fear in the heart of another? Are they inherently evil? You may be surprised by the answers to these questions.

Bullies do not fit into a neat little box. There’s no doubt that evil people live among us. There are those who relish the pain of others and take pleasure in causing distress or harm. However, most bullies are not monsters. So why do they act like monsters?

Bullies are often people who have been bullied or abused themselves, and they cast blame upon others for the bad things in their lives.

People who feel their home life is out of control and they’re not listened to or valued by their family may feel the need to hold positions of power. Such a person may become a boss and gain power by dominating his or her employees, operating on the principle that being feared is the way to gain respect.

A teenager who is constantly berated by a parent or older sibling may feel the need to do the same to others, just so he or she won’t feel like the only victim.

A child who is physically abused at home comes to view violence as normal.

Sometimes, there is no obvious explanation, except perhaps that the bully is a mean and cruel person who only feels good when causing others harm.

~Vashti Quiroz-Vega

Joshua Rush as Robbie

Joshua Rush as Robbie

The Basement is available in amazon and Barnes & Nobles (iBooks, Kindle, Nook)

41 Responses to “Bullied”

  1. glenperk May 24, 2013 at 1:58 am #

    Excellent post, Vashti. From the poetry by Adrianna to your “How a Bully is Made.” Rage against bullies!

    Like

  2. now at home mom May 24, 2013 at 3:07 am #

    well written poet and love how at the bottom you describe them; not all of them do it for the same reasons. Sad people like this can be found every where

    Like

  3. Peter Licari May 24, 2013 at 4:40 am #

    First off, I just would like to say that the poem was incredibly emotive and powerful. It’s been a while since I heard a piece that conveyed an image so potently. A great way to kick off your guest posts!

    I think you hit it right on the head when you said it was hard to define bullies. That’s why I honestly try to befriend them. In my life, I was once (regrettably) the bully– but that was after years of being tormented myself. And then, after I stopped, I was bullied for years to come. The thing that I knew from my experiences is that bullies sometimes just need a friend. Someone who they can confide in. I was fortunate to have friends steer me away from my meanness (in my defense though, it was fourth grade). I try to be that friend for others now because of it. It’s worked out pretty well for me because a positive influence can really help someone stop their negativity. It’s one thing to tell them “this is wrong.” It’s another to lead by example.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 4:55 am #

      Wow Peter, thank you so much for sharing that. There is so much logic and truth to what you are saying. I don’t believe this strategy would work on all bullies, but I do believe a great majority of bullies , like you said, simply need a friend. Wonderful comment Peter!

      Like

  4. lisanewlin May 24, 2013 at 4:48 am #

    I was bullied when I was younger and I remember how horrible it felt. I have never felt as sad in all of my adult life as I did when I was a kid and the victim of bullying. It’s truly a problem and I appreciate you shedding light on it.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:33 pm #

      Oh that’s heart-wrenching Lisa! Bullying is a problem that everyone needs to take seriously. Maybe if more people had the courage to come forth and express how bullying affected them, like you did, the cases would be less frequent. Thank you so much for sharing.

      Like

  5. adriannajoleigh May 24, 2013 at 4:56 am #

    This issue is way too close to home. Ive lost too friends to suicide when I was in middle school because of bullying. ‘Bully’ is such taken as something lightly because some just associate it with someone taking their lunch money or picking on someone because they have a big nose or boobs..whichever. But the truth is, its more damaging than we think. Not everyone is as strong as the next. We never know what lifes challenges lurk at home and just what could push that person over the edge. Thank you Vashti for this awareness and the effort put into opening the eyes of everyone.

    And thank you for asking to write that poem. I would have never thought of it otherwise.
    You are a beautiful and talented writer yourself. I’m very happy to have met you.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:50 am #

      I’m so sorry to hear that Adrianna. That’s horrible. What you said is true. Too many people don’t take bullying seriously. They feel it’s just part of growing up. They’re wrong. Words are powerful, and can have devastating effects on people. Thank you for your comment and for the awesome collaboration.

      Like

  6. Alana Munro May 24, 2013 at 10:54 am #

    Wow very passionate about this subject too, my book has a lot of bullying in it. I think maybe we all have a lot in common (sadly) with regards to bullying upsetting our life. I think I may need to re-blog this post ladies! If you don’t mind? Just believe this is really powerful stuff – the more exposure the better. 🙂 x

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:29 pm #

      Hi Alana! Absolutely repost away! What’s really important is that more people become aware of the damage bullying can cause. Thank you so much for stopping by and for offering to re-blog. You’re the best! 😀

      Like

  7. cicampbell2013 May 24, 2013 at 2:07 pm #

    Super post, Vashti. Love Adrianna’s poem and your piece on why bullies bully. Well done! An important subject to address.
    Christine
    cicampbellblog.wordpress.com

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:26 pm #

      Hello Christine! Thank you so much for stopping by, and for your lovely comment. I am adamant about creating awareness for the issue of bullying.

      Like

  8. Jason CG May 24, 2013 at 2:53 pm #

    This makes me sad, Vashti 😦 I usually stand against these kind of people (bullies) but you know everytime I do, someone misunderstands and thinks I’m the bully. How do you protect the people you love from bad people without raging against the bullies? I honestly don’t know.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:22 pm #

      Awww! Jason I didn’t mean to make you sad. That’s a very good question. Maybe you can calmly let the bully know that they’re being a bully. Sometimes they’re not even aware of it, and your calm, cool demeanor may shock them into acknowledgement. That worked for me once. Have a great day!:D

      Like

  9. cicampbell2013 May 24, 2013 at 4:31 pm #

    Terrific artwork too!

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 24, 2013 at 5:15 pm #

      Yes it is! The artist is from the U.K. His name is Jamie Campbell. He’s also featured in deviantArt as The5thApe. The portrait is called The Girl(2nd edition). Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment. 😀

      Like

  10. Joy May 24, 2013 at 6:04 pm #

    Interesting topic. I think your are right. They hurt others because they are hurt inside too. But that is not the solution to bullying coz it doen not help anyone. And is a vicious circle.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 25, 2013 at 5:20 pm #

      Hello Joy! I agree, I believe awareness is the key. People need to know that bullying hurts. Physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Parents and teachers need to teach their children that bullying is wrong and there are consequences. Thank you for visiting and for your comment. 😀

      Like

  11. coastalmom May 26, 2013 at 7:26 pm #

    This was wonderful! So eloquently written. Right down to the photos chosen along with the poem! But what you had to say was epic!
    There was a program on called IF YOU ONLY KNEW ME and it went around to different schools and gathered kids up at assemblies and divided them and then drew a line in the middle of the gym and asked people different things about their lives. If they’d been touched by the particular tragedy, the took a step. At the end they were all standing nose to nose with the kids on the opposite side of the room. Then they broke up into small groups and shared things about their lives that nobody knew. It was powerful.
    There is an old Patrick Dempsy movie called “You Can’t Buy Me Love” That touches on bullying. I think that everyone should see. There is a scene in it that I wish every Junior Higher would have to watch! Even though it is an old movie from the 80s unfortunately it still is prevalent!
    Great post!!!!

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 26, 2013 at 8:07 pm #

      Hello! Thank you so much for stopping by and leaving your very supportive comment. I’m going to definitely find that movie and watch it with my nieces and nephews. That program you mentioned read very interesting. I could clearly see the point of what they did. 😀

      Like

  12. coastalmom May 26, 2013 at 7:35 pm #

    Watch this… it’s not even 5 minutes… but I made my kids watch the movie… for this very scene.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 26, 2013 at 8:13 pm #

      Oh my God! What a cool clip. It brought tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for sharing this! 😀

      Like

      • coastalmom May 26, 2013 at 8:42 pm #

        Your post brought tears to mine! I had to share! Thank you for letting me do it here! It just seemed the perfect place. That film is from the 80s before Grey’s Anatomy and all his newer workes but I feel it was iconic for the time and like I said… I wish it was a mandatory film that every school viewed at Freshman Orientation. We need more programs in our public schools that teach the Golden Rule. I loved the part where the kid goes…. “And you cried all the way”
        🙂

        Like

      • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 26, 2013 at 10:20 pm #

        Me too! My sister is a teacher. I’m going to ask her if it’s possible to show this movie to the kids at her school. It’s worth a try. Thanks again for sharing it. ❤

        Like

  13. coastalmom May 26, 2013 at 10:22 pm #

    oh wow how great!

    Like

  14. Tish Farrell May 27, 2013 at 6:00 pm #

    This is such an important issue, Vashti. Great post.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 27, 2013 at 11:17 pm #

      Thank you Tish. Yes it is an important issue, and it’s very close to my heart.

      Like

  15. katbiggie May 28, 2013 at 8:14 pm #

    Oh Vashti, your writing just always knocks me over. So passionate and beautiful! I am already a follower, but I’m actually visiting today as a co-host from Showin Some Love Blog Hop! I will be sharing this post for sure!

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 29, 2013 at 1:59 am #

      Thank you so much Kat. Your support means a great deal to me. Thank you for stopping by and for the encouraging comment! xx 😀

      Like

  16. diannegray May 28, 2013 at 8:55 pm #

    What an amazing poem and brilliant post. Bullying is such an awful thing and people don’t realise how deeply it effects others. This is a subject very close to my heart and I thank you for sharing your thoughts here.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 29, 2013 at 2:06 am #

      Hi Diane! Thank you!I agree, too many people are not aware of the consequences of bullying. This is a subject close to my heart as well, so you’re very welcome, and thanks again for your support.xx

      Like

  17. Kate May 29, 2013 at 1:19 pm #

    My heart aches for the victims of bullies. What a powerful poem.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega May 29, 2013 at 4:57 pm #

      Hello Kate! My heart aches also. This heart-wrenching poem depicts so well the pain of someone who is relentlessly bullied. The poet’s name is Adrianna Joleigh. Needless to say she’s very talented. Thank you for the heartfelt comment.

      Like

  18. April (@100LBC) May 31, 2013 at 3:26 pm #

    Bullying has been taken to a new level with the internet. Children can’t get away from it. Such an emotional poem. Stopping by from 100lbcountdown.

    Like

  19. pralinka June 1, 2013 at 8:11 pm #

    Although people talk about bullying, children are told about that problem at school and there are some documentaries, people are sometimes still blind. Teachers, parents, whoever. I knew about a boy who was bullied, but the teachers behave like nothing was happening, although we kept telling them. The worst thing is that if you’re bullied, it can change your life forever. Really powerful poem.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega June 1, 2013 at 9:47 pm #

      Hi Pralinka! I know what you mean. I had a similar experience in Junior High school. I had a friend who was constantly bullied, but our teacher ignored it. It was very frustrating. Bullying also affects the friends and family of the victims.

      Like

  20. Rosey September 22, 2013 at 6:10 pm #

    My daughter was bullied in middle school, it’s never a pretty thing. I’m happy to say it’s no longer happening, but it affects things she says/does still. Some things are hard to let go of, especially when you are a child and it’s coming from peers.

    Like

    • Vashti Quiroz-Vega September 23, 2013 at 5:27 pm #

      Oh, I’m so sorry about your daughter Rosey. Unfortunately, too many parents feel that bullying is just part of growing up. They’re wrong! There’s nothing normal or beneficial about being bullied. Constantly tormenting someone in their formative years can leave scars and affect them for the rest of their lives. I’m glad your daughter is no longer bullied.

      Like

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