Haiku Friday – Flare & Steam

15 Dec

Happy Friday, everyone! Welcome!

I hope you are all doing well. It’s a beautiful day here in south Florida, although it’s still a bit chilly and by chilly I mean 70º F––yep, definitely sock weather. 😉

Winter_in_Florida-Haiku_Friday-Poetry-Vashti Quiroz Vega-The Writer Next Door-Vashti Q-the fall of lilith-fantasy angels series

I’m sharing a section from Chapter 16 from my novel, The Fall of Lilith today. The angel Fornues was a follower of Lilith and Satan and he too was cast out of heaven (Floraison). Fornues was one of the largest and strongest angels yet was easily led by the others, especially Lilith. When he fell to Earth he was transformed and could no longer speak but he had the ability to communicate with his mind. This is his account of his fall from grace.

Oh, one more thing. The language in which I wrote this book is a combination of early modern and contemporary English. If you’ve read any of Shakespeare’s works, seen movies like The Gladiator or The Other Boleyn Girl, then you may perceive what I did. 

Chapter 16


I have learned much from Satan’s account of his fall,” Lilith said. “Perhaps we should all tell our stories. It may prove enlightening.”

“That is a great idea.” Samael puffed himself up to tell his story next.

Gadreel glared at him, still hurt by his display of jealousy earlier. “It is a wonderful idea. Dagon, perhaps you should give your account next. I am certain we are all curious to learn how you came to be transformed into a merman.”

Samael muttered under his breath.

Dagon smiled at her. “I think it may be more interesting if Fornues told his story first.”

Samael frowned and huffed.

“Indeed, I am rather curious about how Fornues entered this world and how he came to be as he is,” Lilith said.

“How can the monster tell his story when he cannot break words?” Samael said in a sarcastic tone.

“He is not a monster!” Gadreel frowned and her hands squeezed into fists. “He is our friend and he can communicate to us in our minds as he has done since we came together.” She rolled her eyes at him and turned to Dagon again, touching her hair.

“Shall we move closer to shore, Satan?” Lilith asked.

Fornues interjected, “There is no need, for I can hear all your words clearly—even yours, Samael.” He dropped the last three words to a grumble.

“Apologies, Fornues, I meant no harm.” Samael shrugged.

“Go on, Fornues, reveal your story in our minds,” Satan said.

“I looked down from the edge of Floraison and saw the dark, icy waters of a vast frozen sea,” Fornues began. “Every fiber of my body trembled in fear of the unknown. As I plunged toward Earth, I thought of only doom. I was void of hope. If there was a future to be had at all, I saw only blackness.” Fornues became more and more emotional as he unintentionally transferred the feelings and experiences he described to the other angels. They suffered the despair and physical agony he communicated. “I crashed through solid ice into freezing waters. The pain that swathed me was indescribable. I did not believe I could survive. I suffered a million sharp spears stabbing me simultaneously over my entire body, again and again. I wailed in despair, for who could hear me?”

So real was his description in their minds that the others howled in pain, as though their bodies were crashing through the congealed surface of the frigid sea. Gadreel’s limp body lay sprawled on the ground, as if damaged and immersed in freezing water. Dagon hollered as the excruciating pain of freezing body tissues gripped him.

“I struggled as ice water filled my lungs paralyzing them,” Fornues continued. “I flapped my wings, flailed my arms, and thrashed my legs. It seemed the more I struggled, the faster I sank. I experienced crushing pressure, blows to my abdomen, and small explosions in my eyes. I longed for the light above me whose distance grew further out of my reach.”

Lilith screamed and writhed in agony as her body underwent cold, piercing jabs. Satan tried to assist her, but he, too, suffered the physical torments Fornues described. Samael convulsed as he experienced drowning in the frozen waters.

“I began to undergo a massive transformation, which began with my wings growing heavy. They began to tingle and blister as the freezing water destroyed underlying tissues. My wings congealed and became as ice. They became so painful I wanted to rip them off. My body grew and expanded in every direction. All the while, I shrieked and groaned, believing my body was being torn apart.”

Satan howled, clutching and tugging at his wings, for the pain they yielded was unbearable.

Fornues stopped communicating. His friends moaned, contorted, and juddered on the ground. “What is happening?” he asked.

“You have drawn us into your rendering, and we have suffered all you have described thus far,” Lilith said, breathless and wincing.

Fornues realized for the first time that he had the ability to project his feelings and physical torments onto others if he did not control his emotions. “Apologies. I was not aware I had such capacity. Perhaps I should not render my account.”

“Nonsense!” Dagon winced as he rubbed his chest and arms. “Simply control your projected feelings. We have all been through much suffering, but this is in our past. Tell us what happened to you, knowing in your heart that you have already overcome all you described and are the better for it.”

Samael threw his hands in the air. “He shall be the death of us all.”

Dagon and Gadreel glowered at him.

“What say you, my prince?” Lilith directed her sight on Satan.

“Pay no mind to Samael and continue your story, but heed Dagon’s counsel and project your feelings inward and not at us,” Satan said.

Samael clenched his jaw and lowered his head.

Fornues continued his story. “I no longer possessed the form of an angel, but had become the monster you see now. My wings were gone. I do not know why, but I mourn my wings the most. I realized I could no longer break words. When I opened my mouth to cry out for help, the sound I produced was a terrible shrill. I continued uttering the jarring sounds as I struggled in the frozen waters, hoping one of my friends would hear my call and somehow recognize it was I. My metamorphosis caused me intense pain, and I was afraid.”

Dagon hung his head.

“I was aware I was all alone and cursed,” Fornues continued. “I struggled against the changes, but only caused myself more pain and suffering. Still, I panicked and lamented, ‘Please, someone help me! I am all alone and in so much trouble.’ I hoped against hope that one of my allies would hear me and come to my rescue.”

“That was uncharacteristically optimistic of you, Fornues,” Lilith said, mocking him.

“His optimism served him and us well since we were able to find each other because of his hopeful cries,” Gadreel said. “Dagon, please tell us your story. I am certain––”

“What of Beelzebub?” Lilith glanced at Gadreel with a sneering smirk. “Does anyone know what became of him?”

Fornues-Haiku_Friday-Poetry-RonovanWrites-The Writer Next Door-Vashti Q-Vashti Quiroz Vega-The Fall of Lilith-Fantasy Angels Series


Pitiful angel

Led astray by one of pause

to suffer and burn

In a dark world without laws

Here was no peace––no escape

(Flare – Burn) & (Steam – Led astray)

Flare and Steam are this week’s prompt words chosen by Ronovan Hester of Ronovan Writes.

Ron hosts a challenge that anyone could participate in called Ronovan Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt Challenge every Monday, and you have until Sunday to create a post featuring your haiku poem. He is an author and poet and also does author interviews and much more on his blog. Be sure to check it out. Read Ron’s Haiku Prompt Challenge Guidelines for more information.


38 Responses to “Haiku Friday – Flare & Steam”

  1. Ritu December 15, 2017 at 3:46 pm #

    Fantastic haiku Vashti, following that intriguing excerpt!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 15, 2017 at 4:40 pm #

      Hi Ritu! Thank you very much! I’m happy you enjoyed it. 😀 xx


  2. olganm December 15, 2017 at 3:51 pm #

    What a terrible and vivid account! Thanks, Vashti!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 15, 2017 at 4:41 pm #

      It’s a terrible thing to fall from grace. 😉 Thank you, Olga! ❤


  3. Annette Rochelle Aben December 15, 2017 at 3:52 pm #

    You did it! WIth styl, m’lady. Great to connect it to the book and thanks for the sneak peak (for those who have yet to read it). Find job.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 15, 2017 at 4:44 pm #

      Thank you, Annette! I understand that the synonyms I used were quite a stretch but what can I say? Those words were tough! What gives, Ron?! Ha, ha! 😉 xx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. D.L Finn, Author December 15, 2017 at 4:03 pm #

    Great excerpt to show the background for the poetry! Very vivid imagery!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. coldhandboyack December 15, 2017 at 4:24 pm #

    Great excerpt. Very detailed and emotional.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 15, 2017 at 4:48 pm #

      Thank you, Craig! I still want to do the character interview with you but I’m torn between Samael and Satan himself. What do you think?

      Liked by 1 person

      • coldhandboyack December 15, 2017 at 5:56 pm #

        You know who will allow you to put your most exciting post together. You have to make that decision. I’m open to either one.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. John W. Howell December 15, 2017 at 4:27 pm #

    Excellent excerpt from a terrific book, Vashti.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 15, 2017 at 4:52 pm #

      Thank you, John! I appreciate you sharing your wonderful review of The Fall of Lilith too. I’ve been meaning to ask, which was your favorite character?

      Liked by 1 person

      • John W. Howell December 15, 2017 at 5:38 pm #

        I thought Lilith was fascinating. She was one up on everyone even when punished by Satan. I didn’t particularly like her though. I guess I’ll have to go with Lucifer as my favorite. A strong character indeed.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Vashti Q December 16, 2017 at 2:54 pm #

        That’s so interesting, John! You’re the third reader that has told me that Lucifer was their favorite character. The most popular character to date is Gadreel. I didn’t write Lilith to be likable, so I can completely understand where you’re coming from but I’m glad she was fascinating. Thank you so much for your input. I enjoy hearing from my readers, especially you. 😀 xx

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Elizabeth December 15, 2017 at 6:51 pm #

    Hi Vashti, 10F here, for sure we need more than socks! 🙂 Great story and haiku, a little dark for my taste, but you write so beautifuly.​

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 16, 2017 at 3:21 pm #

      OMG! 😮 I’m so sorry to hear that, Elizabeth! That’s stand still too long and freeze to death weather. 😉 I know that dark fantasy isn’t for everyone. Thank you very much for the lovely compliment. You know, I’ve had several readers tell me that they normally don’t read dark fantasy or even fantasy but they decided to give, The Fall of Lilith a chance and were pleasantly surprised with how much they enjoyed the book. 😀 xx

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Kester James Finley December 15, 2017 at 9:07 pm #

    Loved this week’s posting, especially because well, Fornues! 😉 The haiku was really powerful and made me sad, especially because well, Fornues lol. GJ V, thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 16, 2017 at 3:26 pm #

      Ha, ha! Thank you, buddy! I thought about you the entire time I was preparing the post! I remembered you told me that your favorite character in the book was Fornues. I wanted to do an interview but it’s very complicated, because of his large size and inability to speak but I’ll figure something out. Maybe we can meet at Miami Beach and have Gadreel as his interpreter. 😉 ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      • Kester James Finley December 16, 2017 at 9:34 pm #

        lol, perfect idea! Just don’t bring Lilith, we don’t need fire and brimstone…again. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Kester James Finley December 15, 2017 at 9:09 pm #

    Reblogged this on The Angry Scribbler and commented:
    Awesome haikus every week and an offering from her work! If you haven’t checked out Vashti Quiroz-Vega’s book, “The Fall of Lilith”, you are missing out! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  10. balroop2013 December 16, 2017 at 1:33 am #

    Wow! Vashti I love the way your Haiku is connected with the ‘pitiful angel’! Have a wonderful weekend. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Gwen Plano December 16, 2017 at 6:17 am #

    Wow, strong writing, Vashti. It was brilliant how you brought the Haiku prompt into your story. Stay warm, socks and all! ♥

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 16, 2017 at 3:32 pm #

      Ha, ha! Thank you, Gwen. It’s already in the low 80s again. I had a tough time with the prompt words this week but then this chapter came to mind. Thank you for the kind words and enjoy your weekend. ❤ xx


  12. Natalie Ducey December 16, 2017 at 10:55 am #

    Vashti, I hope to be able to settle in with The Fall of Lilith over the holidays. Imagery is stunning! Bravo to you. Wishing you a fabulous weekend. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 16, 2017 at 3:36 pm #

      Yay! That would be wonderful, Natalie! Thank you very much. You have an amazing weekend too. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  13. robbiesinspiration December 17, 2017 at 12:02 pm #

    Lovely writing, Vashti.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 21, 2017 at 11:48 am #

      Thank you, Robbie! You have a wonderful holiday season, my friend! ❤ xx

      Liked by 1 person

  14. dgkaye December 17, 2017 at 10:34 pm #

    Wow, ok, I”m hooked! And fantastic Haiku to tie in with the story Vashti! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  15. jaye22 December 26, 2017 at 3:31 pm #

    Hi Vashti, now having read your book it is lovely to re read a snippet, fantastic Haiku x x x

    Liked by 1 person

    • Vashti Q December 26, 2017 at 3:39 pm #

      You’re sweet, Jaye! I’m happy you enjoyed it. Thank you! ❤ xx

      Liked by 1 person


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